MONDAY
-I could be a douche and make a lame SNL "More Cowbell!" joke...
But this motherfucker will probably be my boss in five years...and he DOES kill that shit.
-In this week's edition of the South is weird...
Why did a Athens, Georgia grocery store transform the Georgia Bulldog into a sombrero-wearing, pineapple-munching hellhound?
Ward off potential thieves or....
Did Goser develop a taste for the sweet, tangy, tropical fruit.
TUESDAY
-Delta Force, SEAL Team Six, Army Rangers, The Avengers, Rambo, The Expendables...
SOMEONE, ANYONE JUST PLEASE RESCUE KEVIN LOVE FROM MINNESOTA!!!! HE IS A BROKEN MAN DAMMIT!
SOMEONE, ANYONE JUST PLEASE RESCUE KEVIN LOVE FROM MINNESOTA!!!! HE IS A BROKEN MAN DAMMIT!
Hold on hope Kevin, our government will not abandon you!
-The No Fun League decided to ban dunking on the goalpost following touchdowns and Saints Tight End Jimmy Graham wasn't too happy as he took to twitter to state his displeasure...
"I guess I'll have to lead the NFL in penalties next year!"
Jimbo, instead of worrying about having a flag thrown on you after a score, you should worry about just catching a pass against good teams...
I saw the Seattle playoff game turkey and you were not a factor.
WEDNESDAY
-Florida and Florida State are rivals...
Both are really good at Baseball....
Heisman Winner Jameis Winston plays Baseball for FSU
Sometimes in Baseball, teams have bench-clearing brawls...
Florida and Florida State got into a bench-clearing brawl...
Jameis Winston took part in the brawl...
What happens when the media gets ahold of this news?
Both are really good at Baseball....
Heisman Winner Jameis Winston plays Baseball for FSU
Sometimes in Baseball, teams have bench-clearing brawls...
Florida and Florida State got into a bench-clearing brawl...
Jameis Winston took part in the brawl...
What happens when the media gets ahold of this news?
OMG JAMEIS WINSTON GOT INTO A BRAWL AND PUNCHED A FLORIDA PLAYER!!!! NOT COOL! BLACK! THUG!!!! BLAACCCCKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!
At no point does Jameis Winston punch anyone...
And doesn't look like much happens period outside of a little shoving.
I hate people.
-Get the fix-ennnnns ready....we've found him!
If you don't know what I'm talking about, you never will.
THURSDAY
-Dayton does it again, upsetting Standford (and Cowbell kid) 82-72 to move on to the Elite Eight!
-Dayton does it again, upsetting Standford (and Cowbell kid) 82-72 to move on to the Elite Eight!
Unfortunately, they're playing Florida next so yeah...see ya!
But fuck all that shit right now....
Nick Cannon as his alter-ego: Connor Smallnut...
I have an interesting relationship with Nick Cannon.
I loved Wild n' Out in college.
I hate every movie he's put out.
I've had a crush on his crazy, but sexy-ass wife since Junior High.
I hate every album he's put out.
However, I gotta admit dressing in whiteface and calling his new album White People Party Music is an ingenious PR move.
So Nick, this one is for you...
Nick Cannon: 1
Haters: 0
-Miguel Cabrera? $248 Million Dollars?! At age 30?!!!!!!!
You know he's not getting any younger or thinner right?!
Either way, I can't hate on a dude getting his money. Congrats Miggy and hook a brother up with a Frosty! I know your ass hit up the Wendy's drive-thru to celebrate!
FRIDAY
-Mike Tyson highlights mixed to Barlog's sound effects from Street Fighter II!
This is everything!
WEEKEND WATCH!
What you should be doing this weekend if you know, you’re not drunk or doing something better…
WATCH THE ELITE EIGHT!
If all your Final Four picks are still in it you now have my full permission to act like you know more about College Basketball than everyone else.
Who cares if your criteria was really based on jersey colors or where you got shitfaced that one time four years back.
SEE NOAH!
Russell Crowe is here to save mankind! Wait, he's only going to save his family and two of every animal? Oh shit...better get my umbrella and snorkel.
SEE THE RAID 2!
If all your Final Four picks are still in it you now have my full permission to act like you know more about College Basketball than everyone else.
Who cares if your criteria was really based on jersey colors or where you got shitfaced that one time four years back.
SEE NOAH!
Russell Crowe is here to save mankind! Wait, he's only going to save his family and two of every animal? Oh shit...better get my umbrella and snorkel.
SEE THE RAID 2!
It's the sequel to the best movie you've never heard of! Check out the first one tonight, then catch the second Sunday! I mean it!
FRIDAY SHOUT-OUT!
Recognizing whomever the hell I want!
Shout-out to Lakers gunner Nick "Swaggy P" Young!
Swaggy P had a rough week but he's keeping a positive attitude and I like that!
First, his home is robbed Sunday night during the Lakers game against the Magic.
100k worth of stuff gone. Young's response?
"I was just shocked they tried to get Swaggy."
I don't know what that shit means, but it sounds good.
Then a couple days ago against the Knicks, Swags celebrates a tad bit prematurely on a three-point attempt...
So he missed, who cares? with Swaggy P it's not about if it goes in or not, it's about how pretty it looks in the air!
Keep doing you Nick Young!
Time to make like a chip and dip! As always, thanks for your support! Life is like a hurricane...
-WST'
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