FULL CIRCLE FRIDAY-KILLING ME SOFTY!

All the stories you know and ones you don’t, but should. Welcome to FULL CIRCLE

MONDAY

            -Finally! The Barry Bonds Biopic we all have been waiting for.

Oh, maybe not, my bad.  I’ll see it anyway though!

            -Jaguars Quarterback Blaine Gabbert has a theme song…you did not read that wrong, Blaine fucking Gabbert

That went about just the way I imagined.  Gabbert and Jacksonville were made for each other.

TUESDAY

-Ex-Eagles Defensive End Hugh Douglas was fired by ESPN two weeks after getting into a drunken altercation with Numbers Never Lie co-host Michael Smith and calling Smith an “Uncle Tom.”

Personally, this is very upsetting to me because I always enjoyed Hugh’s contributions to the network…said no one ever.

            -Jason Dufner sleeps with the Wanamaker trophy?

Think that's weird?   Take a trip to any college campus on a Sunday morning and you’ll find hundreds of co-eds waking up next to something a lot worse.

WEDNESDAY

            -Bitch-slapped and down 2-0 at the half, It looked like the U.S. Men’s National Soccer Team’s 11-game winning streak would be coming to an end…Then Jozy Altidure happened.

EPIC COMEBACK!  HIT THE MUSIC!

            -UH-OH, BRADY DOWN!  PANIC!  CHAOS! ANARCHY! CANCEL THE SEASON!

He’s all right…good thing too.  New Englanders would have massacred LT Nate Solder, Bucs DE Adrian Clayborn and then somehow found a way to pin both murders on Aaron Hernandez.

THURSDAY

- Michigan State student decides to pull the “living mannequin” prank on a bunch of coaches and players.

I always watch these hoping for the one time where the jokester gets popped in the nose but alas, it never happens.

- Little Leaguer from Team Panama with a major bailout on this curveball.

Whoooo!  It’s ok little fella; at least you didn’t go down.  Good balance.  However, be prepared for the next curveball you face...puberty.

FRIDAY

            -FOX Sports 1 premieres this weekend...

Is it bad that I just KNOW it's going to fail?

WEEKEND WATCH!

What you should be doing this weekend if you know, you’re not drunk or doing something better…

SEE KICK-ASS 2 OR JOBS!

-The only thing more preposterous than McLoving as a Super-Villain is Ashton Kutcher as Steve Jobs.

EAT PANCAKES!

            -White chocolate, Caramel & Pretzel Pancakes compliments of the Bongo Room...Caucasians and those fucking desserts man.

FRIDAY SHOUT-OUT!

Recognizing whomever the hell I want!

Shout-out to Darren “Mr. No Days Off” Young:  Young is one half of World Wrestling Entertainment Tag-Team, The Primetime Players and was in L.A. earlier this week when TMZ caught up with him and asked if he thought an openly gay wrestler could be successful in the WWE?

Darren’s answer?  Watch below.

Good shit man.  Young is technically a villain, but it’s going to be pretty hard to root against him now.

Thank you for your continued support of the WST.  See you next week!

-WST

WST'S TOP 10 DISS TRACKS!

10. 2PAC-HIT EM UP (1996)

            A lot of people will say this song should be Top 5, maybe even number one to but honestly, it’s lucky to even make the list.  Tupac kind of comes of like a six year-old throwing a temper-tantrum.  Letting his wack-ass crew, The Outlawz, get in on the action didn’t help either as they come nowhere close to matching Makeveli’s lyrics and energy.

9. KOOL MOE DEE-HOW YA LIKE ME NOW? (1987)

            Once upon a time, there was a pretty damn good MC by the name of Kool Moe Dee and he didn’t take kindly to some new kid going by the name of LL Cool J jacking his style…

8. DR. DRE-DRE DAY (1992)

             Dre gets a nice assist from his protégé Snoop Dogg as he takes shots at former friend and N.W.A. co-founder, Eazy-E following a messy divorce from E's Ruthless Records. Luckily, the two later managed to make amends with each other right before Eazy’s passing in 1995 from AIDS.

7.NAS-ETHER (2001)

            The Nas-Hov feud had a lot of friends and family picking sides in 2001 and after Jay-Z dropped “Takeover” off the Blueprint album, fans thought Nas was down for the count.  God’s son not only got up but also came back HARD with this track.  He called Jay-Z a Tae-Bo Ho!  That’s just mean man!

6. LL COOL J-TO THE BREAK OF DAWN (1990)

            Following “How Ya Like Me Now” LL Cool J released a legendary response known as “Jack The Ripper” which left Kool Moe Dee’s career with a severe limp.  James Todd Smith could have left it alone but decided to finish the job once and for all while also sending a few verbal jabs towards Ice-T and MC Hammer.  Taking shots at three top-tier rappers was a pretty big deal at the time.

5. EMINEM-THE SAUCE (2002)

            Maybe the most laughable of all the feuds, before Benzino was reduced to doing whatever the hell he now does on VH1’s Love & Hip-Hop, he was the jealous, shit-talking, wannabe-rapping owner of The Source magazine.  Slim Shady, a well-accomplished battle rapper in his own right, tried to play Zino off initially but after a little poking and prodding, Eminem finally answered back with two solid response tracks before offering up this kiss of death.

4. CANIBUS-2^nd Round K.O. (1998)

            Don’t know what it is about people coming at LL Cool J but Cannabis managed to do what Kool Moe Doe could not.  An up & comer and former fan of LL, he had plenty of ammo and effectively slapped the legend with a dose of reality. 
                                                                                                                                              Unfortunately, that’s all his career would be known for as only a few (he may have kidnapped their family members) fans remain loyal to Bus today.

3. ICE CUBE-NO VASELINE

            Before Dre and Eazy-E had issues of their own, neither were very happy when Ice Cube decided to leave N.W.A. for his own solo career. So they decided to test Cube a little bit with a songs aimed at their old buddy.

Guess they forgot that Cube was easily the most talented member of the group and it’s never wise to wake a sleeping giant.

2. COMMON-THE BITCH IN YOO (1996)

            People tend to forget Common has been around for a long time, however, Ice Cube will never forget as he misinterpreted and took a offense to a line in Common’s "I used to love H.E.R."

Cube then released mediocre diss track “Westside Slaughterhouse” thinking a mild-mannered, spiritual rapper like Common wouldn’t (maybe even couldn't) respond

Wrong.

Common demolished Cube over this Pete Rock beat and while his acting career has flourished, Cube’s rap career hasn’t been the same since.  Things got so heated, the Minister Louis Farrakhan had to step in and mediate.  Today both men share heavy respect for each other but lesson learned: the South Side of Chicago is not to be fucked with.

1. KRS ONE-THE BRIDGE IS OVER (1987)

No jealously. No fallings out. No Violence.  No contract squabbles.  

The greatest diss track of all time and blueprint for all others was over something more meaningful: who gets claim as the birthplace of Hip-Hop? 

South Bronx, represented by Boogie Down Productions and KRS One or Queensbridge, represented by the Juice Crew and MC Shan?

The rest is history.  Today, no one mentions anywhere other than the Bronx as being the home of the genre. Mc Shan’s career was ended that night while KRS One and Boogie Down Productions became legends.

-WST

WEDNESDAY RANT-KENDRICK LAMAR YOU EVIL GENIUS!!!!!

So…anyone else hear any interesting songs in the last 24 hours?

L.A. Lyricist Kendrick Lamar made Hip-Hop history Monday evening when his guest verse on the Big Sean single “Control (HOF),” dropped during FunkMaster Flex’s radio show in New York with the lyrics instantly igniting a fire on the web that has yet to flame out. 

I’ve included the verse and lyrics below in case you’re not a rap fan or were just busy…

  I mean like getting kicked out of your place or in jail busy because that’s the only way you didn’t hear about this shit somewhere:

“I heard the barbershops be in great debates all the time:


"Who's the best MC?" Kendrick, Jigga and Nas,


Eminem, Andre 3000—the rest of y'all


New niggas just new niggas; don't get involved.


And I ain't rockin no more designer shit;


White Ts and Nike Cortez, this is red Corvettes anonymous


I'm usually homeboys with the same niggas I'm rhyming with, But this is hip hop and them niggas should know what time it is.


And that goes for Jermaine Cole, Big KRIT, Wale,

Pusha T, Meek Mill, A$AP Rocky, Drake,

Big Sean, Jay Electron, Tyler, Mac Miller:


I got love for you all but I'm tryna murder you niggas,


Tryna make sure your core fans never heard of you niggas,


They dont wanna hear not one more noun or verb from you niggas.”

THE PUBLIC RESPONSE:

“A 26 year-old Compton kid calling himself King of New York?!” 

Like that’s really hard to be anyway…name five Big Apple rappers under 30 you’d pick-up in a Hip-Hop fantasy draft?

“Did He really say it’s just him, Jay-Z, Nas, Eminem and Andre 3000?!”

Yes he did, and when they combine their powers, they do indeed summon Captain Planet.

“Why did he diss his friends?  Especially guys he works with?!”

Actually, it’s more a challenge to a friendly verbal sparring session. You know, it IS alright to be cool with someone yet. still want to destroy each other in competition.  See Jordan, Michael & Barkley, Charles. Hell, look at the the end of Rocky III:

“His verse wasn’t that impressive anyway!!!”

First of all, stop eating all that hate for breakfast.  It’s bad for you. 

Secondly, when you break it down, it’s not like he does anything other-worldly, he is simply laying down a challenge/call to arms. 

Here’s the WST-interpretation of the verse: “I feel I’m the best in the industry right now, and I’m going to do everything I can to further distance myself from the pack, so it would be wise to collectively step your games up as well.

That’s what Kendrick is saying and it’s AWESOME!  That fearlessness is going to bring out the best in Lamar, everyone he mentioned…

As well as the rappers he DIDN’T mention...hi Tunechi!

That is what makes the verse special.  In fact…

It was Gladiator “are you not entertained, are you NOT entertained?” shit.

That was Ric Flair saying, “Don’t like it? Learn to love it because it’s the best thing going today!”

Imagine Lebron James getting on TV the night before the NBA season kicks off and declaring himself the best Basketball player in the world (don’t be stupid, he is) while openly challenging Kevin Durant, Derrick Rose, Carmelo Anthony, and Chris Paul to come get what he’s got. 

What if Adrian Peterson grabbed an announcer and microphone after a 200-plus yard, multiple TD game, looked right into the camera and dared Arian Foster to top his performance in that night’s prime time game?

Pretty sure sports fans ever hear something like that, they'll need a cigarette, a shower, and a turkey sandwich afterwards.

But that is exactly what Kendrick Lamar did Monday and hopefully it’s just the beginning of something spectacular.

-WST

FULL CIRCLE FRIDAY-WHISTLE WHILE YOU TWURK!

All the stories you know and ones you don’t, but should. Welcome to FULL CIRCLE

MONDAY

            -Nuggets Center JaVale McGee is kind of known for his entertaining, yet, moronic antics on the court.

So did you think he’d be any different off it?

-Have you heard of Anastasia Ashley?  She’s a 26 year-old pro surfer who has a how should I say it? NICE way of warming up before competitions…

Well then...this calls for yet another...

TUESDAY

-Some drunk broad jumped into the fountains at Kauffman Stadium during the Royals 13-0 win against the Twins…

Worst wet t-shirt contest ever.  I knew there was a reason I’ve always avoided Kansas City.  Oh, and I hope both camera guys choke on pieces of brisket. 

-Shot at bowling a 300! Come on Troy Walker!

Listen to that, put the whole blame on himself. You’re a great sportsman buddy, but FUCK AND THAT. If that’s yours truly, someone is marking me down for a strike or at least giving me free bowling alley nachos for life.

 I know one guy who would be getting that perfect game…

WEDNESDAY

            -Oh shit, BEAR ON A MOTHER-FUCKING SEA-DOO!

He’s about to CRUSH all the she-bear sniz tonight!

            -Jazz Center Enes Kanter went fishing for the first time with Karl Malone...

It’s never good when your day’s catch is smaller than Malone’s draft day tie.

THURSDAY

            -Children Beware:  Kevin Durant doesn’t care how much money Mommy and Daddy paid for you to attend his camp.  You think he’s going to cut your little punk-ass some slack?  DURANTULA TERRORIZE!!!!!

Packed that shit like he’s taking a vacation!  Don’t like it?  Buy a puppy.

            -Look at this fan make this diving catch only for his face to make love to the wall during a class-A Dayton Dragons game…

Magnificent grab though.  Only cost him a couple teeth.

FRIDAY

            -This Jason Sudeikis bit for NBC sports is probably funnier than Meet the Millers.

If you see that shit, I promise I'll be waiting for you when you get home holding a tube sock filled with bar soap.

WEEKEND WATCH!

What you should be doing this weekend if you know, you’re not drunk or doing something better…

SEE ELYSIUM!

            -In Dystopian Earth 2154, Matt Damon plays some sick dude trying to reach the orbiting space station Elysium in search of the medical technology needed for his survival.  Shit won’t matter if he doesn’t have insurance though.

SEE PLANES!

            -Same concept as Cars!  Your kids won’t care though, and you’ll shell out $30 dollars to take the whole family to the theatre.  Afterwards, Disney and Pixar will continue to bleed your wallet as you’ll spend the next calendar year buying toys, lunch boxes, pajamas and other shitty merchandise featuring a main character who’s only difference is that he’s a shitty plane as opposed to a shitty car.

WATCH NFL PRESEASON!

            -Who cares if that Quarterback getting the bulk of playing time will be working the day shift at your local mall’s Jamba Jucie in a few weeks?  Football is here!

FRIDAY SHOUT-OUT!

Recognizing whomever the hell I want!

Shout-out to Belize!  By now you know (since I won’t shut-up about the shit) I am two days removed from a week-long trip to the country of my mother’s birth and it was a great time.  Thanks to all my family who made it memorable.

Plus look at the country’s flag up there; black dude with a club...Latin guy with an ax.  Both wearing capoeira pants.  Who’s fucking with that flag?  NOBODY.

Shout-out to Brandon Moore!  Moore, a Gary, Indiana native and University of Illinois alum announced his retirement earlier this week after 10 NFL seasons, all with the Jets.

The WST would like to recognize Moore for his most memorable NFL moment:  As the ass that caused Mark Sanchez's epic failure of a fumble last season on Thanksgiving against the Patriots.

Thanks for your contributions Brandon and best of luck in all future endeavors.

That’s a wrap (short week I know).  Back Monday with five full days of well…nonsense.

-WST

NFL ALL-TOOLBOX TEAM 2013 (DEFENSE)

DEFENSIVE LINE-DESMOND BRYANT (CLEVELAND BROWNS)

WHY?  Party too hard.  End up in a family’s front yard.  NFL players have done worse.  But when this is your mugshot…

DEFENSIVE LINE- D’QUAN BOWERS (TAMPA BAY BUCCANEERS)

WHY?  He brought a gun to the airport.  Yeah, you can’t do that. Guess he didn’t catch Katt Williams American Hustle special…

DEFENSIVE LINE-JOHNNY JOLLY (GREEN BAY PACKERS)

WHY? Back in the league after a three-year suspension following an arrest and prison time for possession of 200 grams of codeine.  He’s a purple drank kingpin. 

LINEBACKER-VON MILLER (DENVER BRONCOS)

WHY?  We went over this Friday.

LINEBACKER-ROLANDO McCLAIN (RETIRED)

WHY? Eighth overall pick in 2010. Four arrests in three years. The scourge of Decatur County, Alabama. A complete waste of talent.

At least he doesn’t let a little thing like jail ruin his day.

LINEBACKER-QUINTON GROVES (CLEVELAND BROWNS)

WHY? Arrested as part of a prostitution sting in April. I always figured if you were a big-money pro athlete, ass just gets thrown your way and there's no need for a dial-a-ho service.  Guess I’m wrong.

LINEBACKER-RONNELL LEWIS (DETROIT LIONS)

WHY?  Managed to get into a bar fight near  in Norman, Oklahoma where he was an all-Big XII selection for the University of Oklahoma Sooners.  So let me get this straight: you're a big-time pro football player back at your alma mater where you're worshipped and people STILL want to kick your ass?  Gotta be a cocksmoke.

DEFENSIVE BACK-ALFONZO DENNARD (NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS)

WHY?  Beat up a Lincoln, Nebraska police officer in March.  Lucky they didn’t shoot his ass dead.  Followed it up with a DUI on July 11^th.  The Pats have been pretty busy the last couple months.  Crime is hard work.

DEFENSIVE BACK-PACMAN JONES (CINCINATTI BENGALS)

WHY? Charged with aggravated assault in June for punching a woman outside of a club.  Jones is the Gucci Mane of the NFL: always in trouble, yet somehow manages to keep getting paid despite.  So much baggage, I hear he just lists “jail” as his mailing address.

DEFENSIVE BACK-QUINTON CARTER (DENVER BRONCOS)

WHY? Arrested for cheating at craps in a casino.  Who the hell goes to a casino to cheat at craps?  You can do that with a pair of loaded dice in a back alley with a burning garbage can for heat.  He’s lucky he didn’t pull that shit at the Tangiers…

DEFENSIVE BACK-AMARI SPIVEY (ST. LOUIS RAMS)

WHY? Spivey enjoys treating his ex-girlfriend like a human piñata. He's the type you wouldn't mind seeing run over by a truck carrying potential Biggest Loser cotestants.

Thank you for your continued support of the WST. Beginning tomorrow, I’ll be out of the country in Belize for a week.  Hopefully, I’ll return with some good stories and a killer tan.  In the meantime, be good, keep laughing and don’t do anything too stupid without me.

-WST