Friday, April 10, 2015

FULL CIRCLE FRIDAY-BEAST MODE!


All the stories you know, and ones you don’t, but should. Welcome to FULL CIRCLE FRIDAY.

MONDAY

-Three things are certain in life: death, taxes and Joakim Noah talking shit to LeBron.
These two teams are gonna dance at some point in the Eastern Conference playoffs and four to seven games of Noah being a dick to the Cavs and their fans is a program I can get with.

-Opening night was a disaster for the Cubs as stadium renovations resulted in 45 minute-long bathroom lines and some fans resorted to pissing in empty beer cups.
Which is an improvement when you consider most people around Wrigleyville don't even bother using cups.

TUESDAY

-I kind of feel bad for this schmuck Wisconsin fan...
He would have looked SO cool in that Teletubby costume had the Badgers actually won.

-Suns Forwards (and twins) Marcus and Makieff Morris are under investigation by Phoenix police for allegedly assaulting a man who sexted their mother.
Family over everything!

WEDNESDAY

-Just Prince fielder doing pre-game squats with Rougned Odor on his shoulders...
Could be a lot more awkward...Odor could be facing the other way. 


-Atlanta Hawks guard Thabo Sefolosha suffered a season-ending broken ankle while resisting arrest after he and teammate Petro Antic refused to disperse a New York nightclub following the stabbing of Pacers forward Chris Copeland...

Think ol' Thabo is just lucky they didn't have a taser to planet on him.

THURSDAY

-Wake Forest Cornerback Kevin Johnson received his formal invite to the NFL Draft.  His position coach decided to tweet out the letter the NFL faxed over.
Good Job Kevin!  You can post that on your fridge right next to the Cow you drew in second grade.

But fuck all that shit right now...
We're four months into 2015 and Ohio State, the Patriots and Duke are your champions...is this setting up to be the douchiest year in sports ever?

To answer, let's take a look at the NBA, NHL and MLB teams and fanbases that could further irritate the rest of the nation by winning it all using my WST insfufferability index.

SUFFERABLE
KANSAS CITY ROYALS:  They haven't won shit since the 80's and the way their fans kind of just showed up outta nowhere is a tad bit irritating but hey, it's Kansas City.  There's nothing from that town I'd want outside of some BBQ and Justin Houston.  I could deal with it.

SAN ANTONIO SPURS:  Hating the old-ass Spurs for consistently winning is like getting mad at your usually cool dad after he curses you out as a kid. You're a little upset at first, but you know in the long run it was for the best.

MONTREAL CANADIENS: They've won more Stanley Cups than anyone so that does warrant some disrespect.  On the other hand, they're Canadians, well...FRENCH Canadians but still maple syrup guzzlers and I have a hard time disliking Canadians.

INSUFFERABLE

BOSTON RED SOX: Jesus, remember when people actually had sympathy for Boston fans?  Now I just envision them all as drunk, racist versions of Mark Wahlberg.  Boston is one of the few major cities I've yet to visit and for good reason.  I've seen The Departed way too many times.

GOLDEN STATE WARRIORS:  They've had too perfect of a season and Steph Curry and Klay Thompson haven't had enough adversity in their careers to just be able to lightskin their way into a NBA title. 

There's also this excited little Warriors fan girl...
She doesn't deserve to be that happy.  Warriors win it, she will and I'm not down with that.

PITTSBURGH PENGUINS:  Know what I can't stand about people from Pittsburgh?  They're fucking everywhere.  Every decently-sized city contains a nest of yinzers because everyone born there moves away the fucking second they can operate a vehicle. BTW, Wiz Khalifa's "Black & Yellow" makes me want to wash my mouth out with a bullet.

MOST INSUFFERABLE

ST. LOUIS CARDINALS:  Their fans are basically Ned Flanders...
If Ned Flanders had a self-righteous ego...and didn't like black people.

CLEVELAND CAVALIERS: I could write a whole book on the LeBron hate (who knows, someday I might just) but let's just talk about their fans for a second.  These are people who actually burned $80 dollar replica jerseys when he left town, paid the same amount for his jersey again when he came back last summer and will gleefully boast and talk shit if the Cavs win the finals this year.  I hope the city's water supply gets lead poisoning. 

CHICAGO BLACKHAWKS:  I'm a Blackhawks fan so I can tell you first-hand that we're douchebags.  Few things Chicagoans love more than a winning team and when we got one, EVERYONE latches on.  Six years ago, I couldn't tell you what icing was and today...I still can't but you can bet your ass I'll get drunk and talk shit to a Blues/Predators/Canuck fan the first chance I get like everyone else in this town come postseason.  BTW, the players do things like beat up cab drivers and fuck their teammates wives. 

-Tiger Woods called himself a dumbass after a bad shot in the opening round of the Masters.
If only he had this revelation when he was cheating on his wife with Perkins waitresses. 

FRIDAY

-Steelers SafetyTroy Polamalu announced his retirement after 12 seasons of wrecking every one's shit.  Let's watch this play of him taking Kerry Collins' soul!
Congrats Samoan Samson!  Never cut those locks!

WEEKEND WATCH!
What you should be doing this weekend if you know, you’re not drunk or something better...

GO OUTSIDE!
Shades on.  Sunroof up.  I don't care if it's only 55 and cloudy out.

DRINK A SLURPEE!
Saturday is 7-Eleven's BYO cup day.  I got two buckets ready to ride.

WATCH GAME OF THRONES!
This should go without saying but you have no one to blame but yourself by going on social media before you watch the season premier.

FRIDAY SHOUT-OUT!
Recognizing whomever the hell I want!
Shout-Out to this Florida Bobcat who just dragged a big ass fish right out of the Atlantic Takes a lot of balls to just run up in some one's home and say, "You!  Dinner!  Let's go!"

Florida scares me man.  It's full of alligators and meth heads running around, committing crimes together.

Have a great weekend guys.  "Run you stupid son of a bitch, run!"

-WST
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Monday, April 6, 2015

MONDAY RANT: LET'S TALK ABOUT THE N-WORD!

THE N WORD

A word who’s meaning changes depending on whom calls its name.  A word that when spoken can get you hugged or mugged, kissed or dissed.  It’s a black word, we own it whether we like it or not.  It is a “family” word.  If you are a member of the family through birth, initiation, or invitation, you have a license to say it aloud. 

The word used to belong to the master.  He used the word to identify an entire people who were whipped, raped, and denied justice, for being born of a different skin color than the master.  Those acts of de-humanization were (and in some forms are) prevalent through much of our history in America.

Although the players in the first act have exited the stage their legacies endure.  The whipping, raping, and denial are now as much self-inflicted wounds as not.  However, in the master’s community the word is still spoken in whispers behind closed doors, at the office, over martinis, and yes even in church.  The only difference between then and now is that it is not said face to face.

On the other side of town it can be a greeting or a curse.  It might be said to people you care for and those you don’t.  I wonder if all the times the word has been spoken, by black and white, that we have become numb to the its’ impact.  Instead, we have embraced the word with all of its bitter fruit. In its repetitiveness, we ignore its legacy of blood, sweat, and tears.

The current debate over the whether the word is politically correct is a dialog that could not have taken place in the past without violence or the threat of violence.  We are at a point in black/white relations and indeed black/black relations where the discussion can only lead to an enlightened generation that we have struggled to nurture.  

-Lee Pulliam

"(White folks upset at blacks for saying Nigga) Nigger stop saying Nigger, Im getting a Nigger headache, Stop it! White folks ya shouldn't have made up Nigga. I didn't make it up, its too bad, I say NIGGA a hundred times every morning, it makes my teeth white, Nigga, Nigga, Nigga, Nigga, Nigga, I aint scared of that word "
-Paul Mooney, Legendary Comedian 
I use the word Nigga.

I say it when I rap along to my favorite song...Jay-Z's "Jigga my Nigga."

I say it when I'm watching sports..."BLOCK for that nigga man!!!!  HELP him!"

Above all else, I try to avoid using it in public places because sometimes calling the wrong person nigga can get you punched in the mouth.

So what does it mean when I call someone nigga?

Could just be a replacement for "dude" or it can refer to my friends, my crew, my brothers, part of my extended family.

Speaking of my friends,  I also say it when I crack jokes in the comfort of my home around my close ones.  

Some of them say it too...none of the white ones though. 

If they did, probably wouldn't be too upset.  I know there's no malice or hate in THEIR hearts if they were to say it.  But again, they DON'T say it.  None of them do.

These are people I trust with my secrets, ask for advice, hold me up when I'm down or lend me a dollar to buy some potato chips if I don't want to break the twenty in my pocket.  

They're my niggas.

That said, the word isn't always used in a friendly context...
Saturday night, Kentucky's Andrew Harrison said "fuck that nigga” in response to a reporter's question about Wisconsin star Frank Kaminsky and my honest first reaction?  

Laughter.

It didn't bother me a bit.  In fact, That's some pretty real shit right there. Not very smart but real.

Media asked him how he felt about the guy who ended his season and he said exactly what was on his mind at the moment.

Should he have policed himself better considering the setting and circumstance?  Without a doubt.  

 But he's 20 year-old kid and he'll learn from it.

However, my second reaction, was "shit, watch people flip this on him..."

For the record, there's few things I find funnier than calling a white guy nigga...
Frankly, I find it amusing when any race outside of black people call each other niggas.

True story, I had dinner a few months ago and hear, "love you niggas man!"

Turned around to see a group of teenage Chinese kids.

Want another example?  Saw a group of Arab men getting ready to fight each other outside a bar this past weekend.  

First words out of the instigator's mouth?  "Fuck you bitch-ass niggas!"

Nigga has hit the mainstream(or has it always been?) and everyone wants to be a nigga!  

Until it's actually time to really be a nigga anyway…ahem…Ferguson.

Nigga, of course, has an original, much more sinister meaning too...
So the question remains...why do black people get upset when white people say it?

It's quite simple...

First off, caucasians created the word with the intent of using it to degrade someone for well over 300 years.   

 If you were a "nigger," you were less-than-human and your life wasn't worth the value of someone who wasn't. 

If you were a nigger, you weren't allowed to eat at the same lunch counters, drink the same water, use the same bathrooms or even love the same people as a caucasian.

If you were a nigger, you were ugly, a blemish, a mistake of god.

If you were a nigger, you were dumb, inferior, not good enough.

Secondly, many caucasians still use the word with that very same intent and meaning behind closed doors.

I know because there’s too many scenarios where I walked the campus of my alma mater or office and was greeted with a handshake and grin, only to later find out, it was all a well-played performance that would make an Oscar nominee blush.

If there were a video game called "NIGGAS" at the arcade, white folks wouldn't be able to play cause they used all their quarters up on it's prequel, "NIGGERS."

It's not their word anymore, it belongs to black people.  

Is it "fair?"  Nope.

Is it a double standard? Definitely.  Don't know what a double standard is?  Ask a nigga, they'll tell you.

Do white folks have a right to be outraged because they can't call niggas niggas anymore?  I wish a nigga would...

Should the word be disposed of?  

Sure, but it's not realistic.  Nigga was here when I came into this world and it will be around long after I leave it.

In my world, when I look at the things needed in order to bring African-Americans to prominence, the word nigga comes in last behind eradication of poverty, crime, job discrimination, unhealthy habits, disease, lack of educational institutions and the systematic murder and incarceration of black men.

When white, black AND others all come together to handle those issues, then we can talk about removing the word.

 Until then, Love and Peace my niggas.

-WST




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Friday, April 3, 2015

FULL CIRCLE FRIDAY-KING KUNTA!

All the stories you know, and ones you don’t, but should. Welcome to FULL CIRCLE FRIDAY.

MONDAY

 -When life gets you down, always remember it could be worse, you could be this guy...
They sure he's Canadian?  Because he's got the mannerisms of every person from Wisconsin I've ever met.

-Ouch!
Sadly, he didn't quite stick the dismount, this could hurt him in later rounds...

TUESDAY

-You know how visors are supposed to protect you from eye injuries and such?
Yeah...that's a lie.  They just look really cool.

-The Phillies announced that they will now be serving wine and hard liquor on the main concourse at Citizen's Bank ballpark.  If you know Philadelphia and their fans, you know this really won't end well.

WEDNESDAY

-Fuck a hump day.  It's bump day as Red Wings forward Drew Miller took a fucking skate to the FACE...
followed by Celtics forward Kelly Olynk taking a elbow to the fucking EYE...
But the days winner goes to this jockey who really picked the wrong time to jump off of his horse...

THURSDAY

-Cable providers will reportedly charge $99 for the high-definition viewing of the super-fight between Manny Pacquiao and Floyd Mayweather.

In other news, $5 gets you in and a cup at my spot on May 2nd. 

But fuck all that shit right now...

I'm in first place in a friend of a friend's NCAA pool and heading into Saturday's Final Four.   

For the first time in 20 years, I actually have a chance of winning the whole thing and pocketing a nice sum of change in the process.

However, I've spent all week wondering that if I actually do pull it off, how should I react?  Should I play it off humbly or should I brag about it?

The answer?  
Fuckin right, I'm bragging!

The whole point of winning is to brag! Doesn't matter WHAT you win!  Super Bowl, World Series, fantasy football....shit if you beat your cousin in the potato sack race at a family BBQ, give that motherfucker the WORK and let him know he isn't shit!

In fact,  I'm going to make a jacket that says 2015 BRACKET CHAMPION.  I haven't won yet and knowing my luck, probably won't but it's almost winning and suits my purposes just fine.

-In case you were wondering, Michael Irvin still gets geeked up over the University of Miami...
It's the NIT.  Chill Irv.

FRIDAY
-Wisconsin's Frank Kaminsky was named the United States Basketball Writers Association's most Outstanding Player.  

His reward?  Without a doubt, The most awkward trophy in sports modeled after legend Oscar Robertson. 

I'm not sure if there is a correct way to hold that thing.

WEEKEND WATCH!
What you should be doing this weekend if you know, you’re bracket isn't in flames or something better...

SEE FAST AND FURIOUS 7!
I LOVE YOU FOREVER PAUL WALKER!

WATCH THE FINAL FOUR!
It's going to be Kentucky-Duke for the National Championship and you'll hate it.  Unless you have money on the line of course.  

 EASTER AND BASEBALL!
Once you're tired of your family (let's say 5ish?) grab a brew and watch the Cardinal and Cubs kick off the season!

FRIDAY SHOUT-OUT!
Recognizing whomever the hell I want!
Shout-out to Sarah Thomas!  The Mississippi native was named the first female official in NFL history today!  I think she'll be perfect on the sideline or in the endzone too!

We all know how much women like to judge!

Be safe on those streets, eat lots of Starburst jellybeans.  "Blade Brown is the biggest asshole on the planet!"

-WST
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Friday, March 20, 2015

FULL CIRCLE FRIDAY-DIKEMBE!


All the stories you know, and ones you don’t, but should. Welcome to FULL CIRCLE FRIDAY.

MONDAY
-That's what it looks like when a date went well, but NOT that well.  Never a good sign when the girl's neck goes backwards and straight up like that.  She's going to to have the taste of Hooters Wings, Coke Zero and Mike Kyrzyewski's ass in her mouth for weeks.
-I can only imagine that this guy has SPOT-ON NBA opinions and analysis.  LeBron hate is still a thing?  He was in Cleveland, went to Miami and came back to Cleveland, get the fuck over it.

TUESDAY

 -Here's Hall of Famer Tommy Lasorda doing some kind of old-person bathroom dance...
A video posted by Thomas Charles Lasorda (@tommy2lasorda) on
-Why hasn't he died yet?  I can't see anything he's really got left to contribute to society.  Not that he had much in the first place.

-Here's some Brazilian soccer player bitching at a lineswoman only to get told right the fuck off...
And that's what happens when your wife refs your games.

WEDNESDAY

-Dallas Sportscaster Dale Hansen dropped a pipe bomb on theCowboys over their decision to sign former-Panthers Defensive End Greg "The Kraken" Hardy."
I like the "Barney Fife" smack in reference to Roger Goodell.  The only problem is that we're not Baby Boomers.  No one knows what the hell you're talking about there Dale.

-Good thing he remembered to wear a pair...
Or else those cheerleaders would be a little more intrigued than they already are.

THURSDAY

-TOURNEY TI................OH SHIT!

Already huh?!  Well....
But fuck all that shit right now...I gotta holla at YOU Iowa State!
YO!  What in the blue hell Hoidberg?!  Ya realize you corn-munching motherfuckers busted over 90 percent of the brackets out there with that bullshit loss to UAB?

People came into work (or just skipped it) yesterday pumped and within three hours had to finish the rest of their days with that fart of a performance lingering in their nostrils.

I thought Iowa State was going to mow some teams down!

Probably my fault...maybe I got a little nostalgic...Jamal Tinsley and Marcus Fizer weren't walking through the door and tossing maroon and gold jerseys on...but damn, you couldn't make it to at least the second round match up?

That nickname they gave you?  The "Mayor?"

Not anymore.  Your name is fucking Fred P. Hoidberg, (L)Ames, IA resident.

A lot of people (including myself) think this guy will have the Chicago Bulls coaching gig by this time next year...

Well after that game,  I imagine Tom Thibodeau was just sitting in his office like...
Had six brackets and five of them are all fucked up like your one Uncle who fought in Korea thanks to the Cyclones.

 This is why I'm just a casual fan and only watch College Hoops to see the guys who will be playing in the NBA next year.  

 Fuck College Basketball.

 If you like it, you probably also enjoy things like snuff porn and Hairbo sugar-free gummy bears.

-In another edition of, Life Comes At You Fast....

FRIDAY
-If you're bracket isn't boned yet, give it about two more hours today and I promise you'll be as bitter and disappointed as the rest of us.
WEEKEND WATCH!
What you should be doing this weekend if you know, you’re bracket isn't in flames or something better...

SEE THE GUNMAN!
Sean Penn is trying to cash in on the whole "Old dude kicks a lot of ass" premise that has kept Denzel and Liam Neeson swimming in the dough.  However, he's a little too weird for it to work out.

GO TO BRUNCH!
You know what's awesome? Breakfast Poutine!  I mean any kind of Poutine is flames but when you throw eggs, scallions and hot chilies in the party...good eatin!

FRIDAY SHOUT-OUT!
Recognizing whomever the hell I want!
Shout-out to NFL Defensive Rookie of Year (and player I desperately wanted the Bears to draft) Aaron Donald!  The Rams Defensive Tackle decided to show his pops some love and buy him a new Truck.  Looks like he appreciates it too!

More games to bitch about so I am out.  Is this a joke?!

-WST
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Friday, February 27, 2015

FULL CIRCLE FRIDAY-I'M A FLIRT!

All the stories you know, and ones you don’t, but should. Welcome to FULL CIRCLE FRIDAY.

MONDAY
-Welterweight Matt Dwyer landed a superman punch on William Macario for a knockout Sunday at UFC Fight Night 61.  Macario seems to have been hit so hard, he's been transported back in time to a moment where he's actually winning before hitting the mat for a loss.
-Here's Giants ace Madison Bumgarner dressed up as Paul Bunyan for the team's magazine and he doesn't look weird or goofy at all in the that getup.  The guy wore jeans to his own wedding so no one should really be that surprised. 

 Personally, I think he should just dress like that for games too.  He'd probably toss a perfect game every outing.

TUESDAY

-The Cleveland Browns had been hyping up their new logo for a couple weeks now and that's it?  The fuck is that?  

 Someone advertising company got paid a lot of money to update the look with hunter's vest orange and a snarling cartoon Pug?  I'm in the wrong business.

 New uniforms will be unveiled next week but looks they've already been leaked...

-What else can you do but drop your paddle after getting pawned like that in table tennis?

WEDNESDAY
-Travis Kelce is one of the best showmen in the NFL today when it comes to end zone dancing but there was no way in hell he was beating the big homie Skim Milk.

-D-ROSE PANIC!!!!!

THURSDAY
-A pair of Llamas went on the lam in Arizona and demonstrated excellent speed and elusiveness. 

Several marquee college programs are now interested...

But fuck all that shit right now...
By now we've seen and heard it all: the hot takes, the trolling memes, the #prayfordrose hashtags and yet I feel nothing....

Chicago went into depression mode earlier this week because people love to panic.

Then a couple hours ago, some good news...I guess.

Joy?  Happiness?  No.  None.  Nothing.

 I have no emotion towards Derrick Rose because frankly, I can't buy into the idea that he'll ever be an effective game-changer again.

The player he used to be, who could attack the rim with athleticism and no regard is gone.  Remember that dude?
NEVER COMING BACK!

BTW, as exciting, entertaining and great as 2010-11 MVP Derrick Rose was, a lot of people forget it only took Miami five games to mop them up in the Eastern Conference Finals that year.

FIVE.

Not a classic seven, not a gutsy six, five.

That means it only took one game of that series for the Miami Heat coaching staff to just say, "Fuck it, let's just throw LeBron at his ass."

As for 2014 season , I thought the Bulls were the best team in the Eastern Conference.  

With the combination of added offensive as well as a rookie head coach with Lebron in Cleveland, I really did think the Bulls had a puncher's chance at a NBA title number seven.

Then the you know, then the season actually started....

Rose's game was turned upside down.  He can't shoot!  Derrick is chucked jump-shots and three-pointers like he was getting a bonus for every brick.

If it continues to look anything like that (it will) when he returns...

Pau Gasol has been surprisingly great, a rejuvenated All-Star with no more angry Kobe to worry about.

He's also a defensive liability.  Opposing players love putting their nuts on his head, including pasty white guys from Indiana...
The other All-Star, Jimmy Butler is a great story, but he's not a legitimate difference-maker.

Couple that with the usual litter of injuries to Joakim Noah, Taj Gibson and Mike Dunleavy, Tom Thibodeau's recklessness with his starters' minutes and the Chicago Bulls are right back where they've spent every season since Rose first went down.

NBA Purgatory.  

Hard-working enough to trash scrub-teams on a weekday or catch an elite team napping on a Sunday afternoon, but nowhere near good enough to beat a scary-ass Cavs team in a seven-game series.  

Not bad enough to get a difference-maker in the draft.

Excuse me if I don't buy into the Bulls try-hard and wait for Derrick Rose to rescue them storyline again.

I can't do it.  I've seen it burn too many people too many times.

FRIDAY

-Yoooooo.  Great stick-handling.  Sidney Crosby has your back.  Oh and this still doesn't make the dress white and gold.
WEEKEND WATCH!
What you should be doing this weekend if you know, you’re not seeing 50 Shades of Grey or something better...

SEE FOCUS!
Will Smith is a con man or some shit.  Margot Robbie is a smokeshow.  Should be worth a peep.

WAIT FOR THE DEZ BRYANT TAPE!
The anticipation is killing me!

FRIDAY SHOUT-OUT!
Recognizing whomever the hell I want!
Shout-out to LEONARD NIMOY!

R.I.P.

Heel turn complete.  I'm out.  Utah, get me two!

-WST
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